Lawyers, pharmacy guns, money and Documents
“How many lawyers does it take fill a volcano? I don’t know but let’s find out!” “How do you keep a lawyer from drowning? Pull your foot off his head!” Hey, who doesn’t love a good lawyer joke? Get a room full of people together who can’t agree on anything and they will all bond over their mutual disdain for lawyers. However, the minute they get in trouble they praise the heavens they have an attorney. Do you know why some people go to jail, while others go free for the same crime? Or wonder why some entrepreneurs get sued out of existence, while others just end up out legal fees? It’s the quality of their lawyers and the documents they created in the first place.
We live in a litigious society, which is true. We also live under the rule of law, which allows us to by and large go about our day without fear of roving gangs of machete wielding madmen, our house and businesses being taken over by local politicians, and being able to have some reasonable assurance that red lights will often have their effect. Our legal system is a classic ying yang of positive and negative. Truthfully, the number of slime attorneys who will sue anyone to pay off their student loans and yacht payments are relatively few. By and large, most attorneys are there to support the rule of law.
When you start out your business, you are going to have to do much on a shoestring and bowdlerize as much as you can. However, one corner not to cut is in spending the right money on a known attorney to put together the correct documents that will protect your sorry butt when, not if, some scumbag comes after you.
Jordan was an entrepreneur who started a chain of pizza places in the South. He spared no expense on the toppings and sauces, built Taj Mahal like restaurants and put together elaborate, spare no cost marketing campaigns. In short order, he moved into franchising and his business boomed. Life was good. However, Jordan had one small hole in his game; he hated lawyers. He was still smarting from his divorce and how he had been raped by not only his wife’s lawyer, but his own’s legal fees. He’d be damned if he was going to give a frigin cent to a damn lawyer! Damned he was.
Jordan bought all of his documents off a website which featured a combination of legal docs and discounts on tires. He paid nothing and really felt like he had beaten the man. So a few years later, after his franchises had sprung up all over the country, one of his franchisees made a huge blunder. They hired a convicted pedophile, who they failed to do a background check on, who then carried on a relationship with an underage child, who was too young to work at the restaurant. Now Jordan had to spend the money to hire a professional attorney, because the way his docs were set up, he as the franchiser was not protected from the subsequent mountain of lawsuits. The good news was that he didn’t have to pay much for the lawyer’s fees. The lawyer spent about two hours reviewing his documents and came back to him with one piece of direction, “Close em all down and declare bankruptcy, you are done.”
At French Fry Heaven we learned from his terrible mistake. We have worked with the best in the business and spared no expense. From Nixon Peabody to Greenberg Traurig , we have never been shy about spending the money on the pros who keep not only your business safe, but protect the franchisees and customers as well. We have tapped into Philadelphia’s top attorney, Malcom Jacobson, for just about every day to day issue and needed doc. Between these groups we are under no illusion that we and our franchisees are totally protected, but at least we feel that our butts are not hanging out over a pool of piranha on a daily basis. Skimp, scrimp, save and be frugal in every area you can, but legal teams and the docs they create are protection not to be short shrifted; unless you want your ass chewed up.